Tuesday, September 1, 2009
This one is not a rant
That's the truth. Its not a rant. The reason why is because I have just recently started a new book series. LOTR, meaning Lord Of The Rings. I am very near finishing the first book(the Fellowship Of The Ring) and the series is so far in my top 5 favorite series. I think that if you have not tried these books then you should. As you might know, there were movies made out of these books, but, I am not allowed to watch them until I read their book. Yes, I know, kind of random topic, but I don't really care because LOTR is AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!
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Hi Philip, from New York City.... (I'm your grandma's friend who was at the cottage when you and your mom came out a couple weeks ago.) I agree - LOTR is awesome! I thought the movies were good, but they are never as rich in imagination as the books. Enjoy!
ReplyDeleteSharon
Philip--
ReplyDeleteNothing "random" about your post at all. Its
emergence, even with little or no fanfare,
makes perfect sense to those of us who follow
the RIENSTRA RANT closely. Given your love
for the Potter books, you absitively should be reading Tolkien. It would be a crime if you weren't. (Perhaps not a crime you would be prosecuted for--at least not in Michigan-- but a crime nonetheless.)
And now, a suggestion for you, once you finish Tolkien. Try the Horatio Hornblower
books, by C.S. Forester. I read them right
around the time I read THE LORD OF THE RINGS,
and though they are not about hobbits, but
about a great sea captain, I loved them just
as much--even more, perhaps. I think there
are about ten of them, each not very long.
And, maybe best of all, whatever films might
have been made from them may not even be
available any more, so that you won't have to
be disappointed by any poor cinematic adaptations of them.
Your parents are smart to make you read the
RINGS books first before you see the RINGS
films. They are sending you a message--which
is that words always trump images.
Jesus, you'll remember, is The Word.
Not, "The Film."
And He is sovereign. So, there you go.
Deep stuff here from the Mariner. But worth
your curiosity.
So ask your folks about what I'm driving at,
if it's not clear to you.
All my best to you and your brother.
I have to go now--I'm hard at work making a
Van Jones hand puppet for a little show I'm
giving down at the Grange Hall.
Keep eating fish,
The Ancient One
Phillip--
ReplyDeleteQuite a night last night for the Mariner!
Whilst I was in the land of Nod, I dreamt that Harry Potter came to my home. He knocked on my door, quite peremptorily, and demanded to know if I had read any of "his" books. When I admitted that, er, no, I really hadn't, due to a number of pressing committments including folding my pressed slacks and compiling the number of cold beers
sold in Tiger Stadium between 1921 and its
demolition, he drew his sword and screamed,
"En garde!"
Well, being as handy with the epee as I am
with the pen, I effortlessly sent the saucy imp packing, his fey eyewear askew and his mop top plenty the worse for wear, myself only sustaining in the process just a few small cuts and a completely severed head. From that point on, though, the dream is now rather sketchy--although I clearly remember sewing my head back on, only to then discover that my pants were on backwards.
Anyhoo, when I finally woke up, I obviously
thought of you and your brother, and of something I forgot to ask you yesterday: besides LORD OF THE RINGS and POTTER, what
are the other titles that make up your
"Top 5 Series List"?
I will be waiting to hear, and I know your
response will be enlightening--perhaps
your brother has his own list, too, and perhaps the two of you can even write about your respective lists in a rant that will not
really be a rant but rather a war of words
between the two of you about whose list is
"better," something that all of us out here
would enjoy due to the rapier wit you both
possess and the expectation that you, being
brothers, would turn same on each other in a
savage explosion of bon mots and ripostes rivalling Alexander Woolcott's most urbane outbursts, or at least some of Daffy Duck's
best quips (e.g. "Sez you!").
Well, at least think about it. Mrs. Lumster,
who is 97 and lives down the way, just lost
her pet canary of many years--she's pretty
absent-minded, at her age--so she could use
some cheering up, and always tells me
nothing brightens her dreary existence more
than a new installment of the Rant.
That's odd, in a way, because she doesn't own
or use a computer.
But I think it at least speaks well for your
efforts.
All right, you two frijoles--vaya con Dios.
I'm helping Obama regulatory czar Cass Sunstein prepare a brief for an otter he's
encouraging to sue a zookeeper, so my time
these days is just not my own.
Mariner (Ancient)
Boys,
ReplyDeleteI am writing just to suggest a film to you--
Roman Polanski's version of OLIVER TWIST.
It is probably the only Polanski film you
will be allowed to see until you are much
older.
But, nobody is more able when it comes to
directing movies than Polanski--so I think
you might get a lot out of his adaptation
of Dickens.
You could read the Dickens book first, of
course. And then be ready to weigh in on the
film's versimillitude. Or, lack of.
By the way, have you both died? And if so, how did it happen?
Ha, ha, ha--that was just my irreverent way of calling attention to the recent yawning chasm of decrepitude within the RANT:
no rants, no comments, no responses to reader
questions or suggestions...
Ah, well. As you have said, school has started. And, recess injustice.
I pray it is nonexistent this term--and that is said from the heart.
Keep getting smarter,
The M'ner
Dear Future Adults,
ReplyDeleteThe Mariner hopes this finds you both hale and hearty.
Or, if not hale and hearty, at least Phillip
and Jacob.
Several thoughts, in between hourly doses of
strong, mind-altering medication, have come
to the Mariner recently--not so much thoughts per se, but viewing and reading suggestions for you two brainiacs.
First, a DVD, if you can find it: THE BOY WHO
COULD FLY.
See, it's about this boy. Who could fly.
I josh. But it is a film made for "kids" that I first saw as an adult, and even as an adult (I get a drachma for each time I use the word "adult" in this comment)I loved it so.
It's not animated, either--a plus, by my
lights. It's about 20 years old at this point. Disney. I won't tell you any more so
as not to spoil it, but it's clean as a whistle and if you don't feel inspired by
it, you may have ceased breathing in which
case never mind of course.
And have you ever seen THE RED BALLOON? From
1956, I think. In which a little boy chases
a red balloon all over Paris? No? Oh, you have to. There's a newish DVD edition of it--a beautiful restored print, done as part of the Criterion Collection series.
I know you shavers are all about wonder, and
imagination--so, this gem of a little film
is for you, trust me. No special effects,
either--well, the balloon does stop to eat
a peanut butter sandwich to regain its strength, but that's about it--and instead only the gorgeousness of a great city photographed in black-and-white.
It's not animated, obviously. Either.
I hate Pixar, by the way. But I will stifle
the rant--make it a screed--I could write on THAT subject.
And then, too: in your never-ending quest
for book series--yes, I understand that you just love it when you finish one book in a skein, only to know there are more ahead, because I, too, have known that same indescribable joy--I would suggest any of the Bertie and Jeeves books by P.G. Wodehouse.
Evelyn Waugh (a guy, despite his suspicious
first name), a titanic British man of letters, once called Wodehouse the greatest
writer in the English language, a comment that thrilled those of us who were weary of Wodehouse being thought of as a trivial "humorist." Waugh noticed, being very smart, that Wodehouse knew how to use words to make people laugh perhaps better than anyone, and based his appreciation of Wodehouse on that.
(I get a sou each time I write the word "Wodehouse" in this comment. I'll need all
the coins pretty soon, too, to pay for my 'free' government health care!)
The character of Bertie is an English rich guy, young and stupid. Jeeves (yes,
the search engine "Ask Jeeves" took their
name from Wodehouse's Jeeves) is his butler,
who knows everything about everything. The
way they interact, through dialogue, is
very, very funny.
I recall that when I was about twelve or so,
my dear old dad suggested the Bertie and
Jeeves books and short stories to me--there
are many. I read them then with intense
pleasure, and have kept re-reading them ever
since. Plus, British TV did a very, very faithful series of one-hour adaptations of
a lot of the Bertie and Jeeves tales, starring megastar Hugh Laurie as Bertie
and Stephen Fry (who you may have seen in
films)as just the perfect Jeeves. Most of
them, unlike with the Potter films, are
real enhancements to the written work they
are based on.(They are also easy to find, as
PBS Video DVDs.)
Days pass lazily here at the cove. Even so,
I am able to profoundly amuse myself by counting my fingers, as well as the number of times President Obama appears on television each week. Also, it's National Kumquat Month, so I have been busy in the kitchen making endless tributes to that oft-forgotten fruit--led by my Kumquat Fritters, which are just like the ones Mother used to make, which may be why they don't taste so good given that she died in 1896.
Okedy-doke, you pintos. Keep on keepin' on.
TAM
Dear P and J,
ReplyDeleteThe Mariner wishes to correct errata in
yesterday's transmission.
And now, he shall.
I actually have, under glass in my mountaintop laboratory, some Kumquat Fritters that Mother made back in 1896. Last week, my twin pet monkeys--Yambo and Piquant--"got into them," and as a result (them monkeys is devilish), some matter from the ancient, bacterially challenged baked goods wound up
on my dinner plate.
So: I now know what they--the
circa 1896 fritters, not Yambo and Piquant--taste like.
And, what it's like when you go to the emergency room hallucinating so wildly
you believe you are a horse made out of cream
cheese.
And what the phrase "technicolor yawn"--always
wondered--means.
And, as such, that my own fritters, sadly, are "just like the ones Mother used to make."
I know you were nearly hysterical--there, there--waiting for my full, emotionally charged explanation. But now, be soothed.
Further, you might still be pondering how a red balloon could have ever been in a black-and-white film.
Well, the film was called "The Red Balloon"--
so, we just knew that the balloon in it was
red, you see, even though it looked kind of
gray. That was what we used to do, back
then--use our imaginations, a somewhat lost
art that I think you two boys are almost
single-handedly alive, with the expert help of your parents and the books and films they are steering you to experience.
To complicate this, I think some dimwits might
have even colorized the film, such that the
DVD of it now is gussied up that way.
Or maybe it was always in color in the first
place, and the 1896 fritter crumbs or even
my own substandard fritters
are taking their toll on my ability
to cognate and pump oxygen to my brain.
By the way, is Warren Harding still President?
Okay: corrections made, I'm off to ride an
elephant through a wall made of meat loaf!
Scudda-hoo,
The Ancient Mariner
Lads,
ReplyDeleteI left the word "keeping" out of the above
post. You'll see where it fits in, making
sense out of an otherwise senseless sentence.
And yes, I'm sure this latest mistake, too, must be due to fritters.
I've always wondered what it would be like
to be a marsupial wearing a top hat.
Now--as I can see when I look in the mirror-- I don't have to wonder any more.
Mariner
Memo to: Fry, Small
ReplyDeleteFrom: Mariner, Ancient
Re: WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE pix
Film of above acclaimed Maurice Sendak book
opens nationwide mid-October. Will provide
immediate rant possibilities, i.e. how
faithful is film to book, how good/bad are
costumes/animation (hard to tell, from
TV commercial, which being used), why book
though thought classic too dorky for
Rienstra delectation (or, not).
Thank you for your consideration.
Very sincerely,
The Ancient Mariner
cc: Yambo
Piquant